I’ve recently started a pescatarian diet. Its alias is vegetarian with fish and eggs.
I did it several years ago after I came off a series of fitness modeling shows. The main reason being that I was dating a girl that was vegan, so I tried my best to fit in. Come to think of it, that was about the first time I tried hummus.
Things have changed. Ever since then, I’ve spent those aforementioned several years trying to build muscle and lose the fat from the muscle building phase. I would take winter and summer to lift my ass off, then take spring and fall to try and cut the weight. It was a process that actually worked for me. I was 193 pounds stepping on the stage of my show and now currently tip the scales from 231-235.
Strongest I’ve ever been. Not the leanest, though. I tried a year ago to get as lean as possible. Not only was it a miserable diet, but I could only get down to about 218. Therefore, I know I’ve added almost 20 pounds of pure muscle in 6 years all while still doing burpees, running long distances, conditioning circuits, Spartan races, and Kettlebell classes every Thursday night.
Some people think you can’t gain muscle off that.
All in all, I don’t want to live my life losing weight to gain weight and repeating it twice a year. So finally this year, I decided that I love where I’m at. I can lose 5 pounds if I ever wanted to. I can lift my tuckus off. I can run 5 miles. I feel like if life threw me a grizzly bear and I had to push over a huge boulder and climb up a tree to get away from it 3 miles away . . . I could.
Back in February I was making meatballs from turkey and really just lost my appetite. I thought to myself, “Why am I eating this?”
The answer was for protein. I didn’t enjoy chicken, turkey, or even steak anymore. I felt like I was just eating it because it had protein in it. So I went back to my vegan-ex-girlfriend roots and decided to go back to the state in my life where I gained the most energy and had the most lifting gains.
I am now eating quality foods that are low in calorie, extremely high in nutrients, and still add up to my protein levels I need, for my iron levels to be correct, and my muscle recovery to be present. You may not think fish and eggs can be enough protein, but you’re wrong. A serving of eggs. A serving of fish. And high energy, nutrient packed foods like that ones I’m about to list will get the job done.
I’m not saying go pescatarian. I’m saying maybe we should all look at food differently instead of looking at it as a protein, carb, or fat source.
And laugh a lot! I’m not going to bore you with lists of foods and call it a day. Personally, I want to enjoy writing this blog for you. So I’m going to make it entertaining hopefully. Put all of these foods in your grocery cart and work your protein sources around them. Your life will be full of energy and your recovery time will be crazy quick.
The life of a pumpkin is rough. You’re picked from your habitat. Cut open. Gutted of your seeds. Left to rot on your front porch. Then smashed on your enemies driveway. Poor pumpkins.
What we need more of is middle aged white women in Daria glasses, slipper boots, and tight Spandex to talk about you all fall long. They order you in their coffee. Their beer. Their pastries. Their toothpaste. Their Doritos. Their toilet paper. Little do they know that what they are ordering is actually pumpkin spice (cinnamon, nutmeg, sugar, clove). So they’ll love you like you’re their overweight cat and never cut into you as long as your flavor is sprinkled all over their food.
Little do people know, pumpkin is crazy good for you. The orange color (beta-carotine) is probably the key ingredient. It aids in Vitamin A and helps aid in fighting cancer (f*** cancer!). The carbs that come from pumpkins are 80% fiber sourced so we can eat it like a vegetable and get the fuel impact like a carbohydrate. Pumpkins have more potassium than a banana per cup. Not to mention pumpkin seeds have tryptophan in them which carries serotonin, the mood altering chemical in your brain (another reason we fall asleep on Thanksgiving). Healthy fats to reduce bad cholesterol. Pumpkins have it all, yo.
Yo edamame so ugly, that it looks like a green peanut. Oooooooo!
Yo edamame so fat, that Harry Potter’s sorting hat put her in the Waffle House. Oooooooo!
Yo edamame so healthy, that it contains 17 grams of protein per serving, all 9 essential amino acids that your body cannot manufacture, manganese and magnesium for bone health, and mad antioxidants for your immune system.
Edamame is an unprocessed version of soy. They say it leads to increased estrogen levels which is why males shy away from it. I only see edamame and soy being a problem for women who can’t have raised estrogen levels. Your doctor will let you know.
However, I’m almost positive that if you eat a serving of edamame a couple times a week, you won’t grow any man-boobs.
Yo edamame so ugly, you scare all the dudes away. Oooooooooo!
I get so pissed off at avocados. One day I’m ready to make freakin’ guacamole and the next day my idiot avocado looks like Freddy Krueger. Despite my anger from not being able to make one of the best appetizers in the world, avocados are the shit. If you’ve never eaten one of Mexico’s juicy testicles, then it’s been too freakin’ long. Avocados taste like nature’s butter. The fats keep your testosterone levels in check from all that damn edamame you eat and the phytonutrients in them help reduce muscle soreness. Next time you make a chicken salad, plop this crap in it. Mayo? That shit’s nasty. Here’s your warning avocado. Make up your damn mind if you want to be a grape or a raisin, but at least give me a head’s up so I can at least top you on my freakin’ eggs in the morning.
Hey avocados! You think you’re the only healthy fat in town? I’m always forgotten on the block. While you’re getting mashed and mixed up with cilantro, I’m sitting in a jar or can in the pantry. People only know me because of my oils. Little do they know, that my antioxidant levels and anti-inflammatory levels are equal to blueberries. You don’t see me being put in waffles though.
That’s ok. I’m about to round up my Spanish green friends, my Greek friends, and our leader Kalamata. We are going to take this town by storm and show all the healthy fats in the world that olives are more than just a source you can stuff cheese and pimentos into. We are one of the world’s healthiest foods and we won’t take it anymore. #blackolivesmatter
P.S. Don’t buy me in a jar. Buy me at the olive bar.
Zeke: “No, it’s a cabbage.”
Gaston: “Does it taste like bacon?”
Zeke: “No, it tastes like a cabbage.”
Gaston: “Can I lick it?”
Gaston: “How many nutrients does it have?”
Zeke: “21. More vitamins than broccoli, cauliflower, and asparagus.”
Gaston: “How many antioxidants?”
Zeke: “70. More fiber and protein than kale.”
Gaston: “Is that a ball?”
I apologize for the bold truth about to be spoken. . .
Potatoes! My favorite food in whole wide world.
The greatest thing about potatoes is that consuming them can literally effect your entire body. It’s incredibly high in vitamins, especially B6. Vitamin B6 is essential in building new cells in the human body. It’s also one of the best foods and vitamins for muscle endurance (Jungle Gym). Muscles need potatoes and Vitamin B6 to help breakdown glycogen, which is how sugar is stored in our muscles for activity.
I can’t say the word potatoes without thinking of this skit. Probably 4 of the funniest guys in the world. Give it a watch. Scoopsy potato!
This is where your body changes,